Smoke Gets In Your Eyes

And that probably isn’t the only reason why the haters of freewill here in Washington voted to enact the nation’s strongest anti-smoking measure, making it illegal to light up inside of any public building or gathering place or within 25 feet of the doors, windows or air vents of said locations as of 12:01AM PST this morning.

This list includes bars, restaurants, pool halls, bowling alleys or any other place of business you can think of, including private clubs. All of the cigar bars and hooka joints closed their doors last night to record crowds gathering for one last legal puff.

When riding the Washington State Ferry System, the upper rearward flydeck, where you used to be able to go out for a smoke (provided your lighter could handle to rush of air) is now ixnay on the okingsmay, but you can still go out there to get a lungful of the lovely diesel turbine exhaust after pounding down a few beers in the ferry’s on-board bar before getting back in your car to finish your drive.

Also, since this law mentions “Work Places� as all locations that people work, even if they are outdoors, smoking in the parking lots where you wait for said ferry boats and constrictuion sites are included.

You read that right, smokers who are waiting in line for the ferry are not allowed to smoke in their vehicles with the windows rolled down because that is the workplace of the State Patrol officer who is helping the bomb sniffing dog check your vehicle.

Some of the local 911 centers are gearing up for the flood of calls to 911 from the anti-smoking Nazis,

Don’t expect Smoke Police to go undercover looking for illegal smokers or bar owners who tolerate smoking, but violations also won’t be ignored. The fine is $100.

It’s up to law enforcement agencies to cite individuals.

“It’s a law like any other and we will enforce it,” said King County Sheriff spokesman John Urquhart. As calls come into the Sheriff’s Office, Urquhart said, they will be prioritized like any other call. Don’t expect a deputy in three minutes.

And the reality, Urquhart said, is that by the time an officer arrives, the cigarette will be put out. A citation requires catching someone in the act.

People can call 911 but Roger Valdez of the King County Public Health’s Tobacco Prevention Program said they might get better results by calling the county’s Environmental Services Division at 206-205-4394. Push 3 and ask for the tobacco program.

Or they can borrow my cell phone and speedial my preprogrammed 1-800-EAT-SHIT number for quick response swift kick in their shriveled nuts, absolutely free.

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