Folks, I may just have to move back to Seattle if he goes through with this.
Nickels announces plan to cut youth criminals in half
He wants $9 Million and he wants to start doing it by the middle of 2010. I guess the delay is that he’ll need to build a special abattoir for the task.
Fine with me. Hell, I’d support giving him $18 Million since this plan will probably make Seattle most crime free city in the nation. Hell, I’d support $36 Million if he’ll broadcast it on SPAN (Seattle Public Access Network).
When I used to live in Seattle, coming home in the morning and finding a ditched stolen car in front of the house ever two to three weeks was normal. Sometimes it was so stripped that I wondered just how they got it there without a roll-back flatbed truck. And this was in a well established neighborhood full of retirees and young working families.
Seattle is short on staff in the police department and they pay a fortune to King County to house the criminals they do catch in the county’s jail system, so I think this will be a win-win-win situation.
Oh, wait a sec.
He just wants money for “social programs” to cut “Youth Crime” in half.
Shit!
Never mind.
“Nickels announces plan to cut youth criminals in half.”
The idea of cutting criminals in half appeals to me; will it be done by a machine, or a person?
Well, since a large number of the lumber mills in the area have been shut down, and since Nickels is so hip on recycling, I say we “recycle” the machinery from there.
That’d be “green” (and red all over).
The Weyerheuser mills in Everett, Edmonds and Federal Way are still there with most of the machinery intact. I’m sure that they could be re-commissioned for relatively little investment. Just throw ’em on the conveyor belt. Works for me.
Lengthwise or crosswise?
And will there be live webcam coverage or at least YouTube videos?
gimme a machete and i’ll do it for free.
Oooh! Ooooh! Lengthwise! No. No. Crosswise!
Damn. I guess we’ll let them decide. It’ll add to the suspense for the audience.
I love it! Webcams so we can watch it at work! Yessss!